Genital jousting app3/20/2023 John is a dick and an arse, both literally and figuratively. He had the promotion, he was nice to her, why didn’t he get what he wanted? John feels led on, in spite of having had otherwise a lovely night. Now, John doesn’t understand why all his accumulated friendship points didn’t win him sex. His coworker Barbara does not invite him in for sex after the date, a desire he has repeatedly mentioned during the drunken evening. He gets her drunk, showboats sloppily behind the bar, then insists on walking her home. John asks his coworker on a date, which in his mind he has earned. His male best friend Sam asks if he’s okay, which he isn’t, but John doesn’t want to be seen as a softie, so he doesn’t talk about the physical pain he’s enduring. Our ‘hero’ manages to get a promotion at work by testing a particularly nasty and dangerously powerful vibrator, injuring himself in the process. Immediately you might expect the game to make hay about his occupation, and its lack of heterosexual male appeal, but within this world it feels pretty normalised. John rushes off to work, running late to his bland and boring office job at the dildo testing factory. (Fun side note: in Genital Jousting there are both male and female penises, a step forward for trans presentation in games if ever I saw one.) To top it all off, John wants to turn his life around before the reunion so people will see him differently to how they did in school. He lives alone, struggles to keep on top of his own hygiene, eats nothing but takeaway meals, has a filthy home, and a study that’s basically a gaming-stroke-porn room. He has nightmares of being harassed by big scary punk kids, and his dreams always end with him being reminded that nobody will ever love him.įrom the first moments, it’s clear that John is living with depression. John (presumably his surname is Thomas) is a middle-aged penis who, three months out from his school reunion, is anxious about how he will be received by his classmates. That perception of the game somewhat shifted when the game released on Steam, thanks to the presence of a remarkably timely and serious story mode about a guy called John who… well, there’s no other way to put it. It never seemed like an especially serious game more a lighthearted laugh where players can giggle at the naughty stuff going on. Players struggle to control disembodied cartoon penises with anuses at the ‘bottom’ of their testicles, which wriggle around trying to penetrate each other. Most people know Genital Jousting as a slightly silly multiplayer party game which has been doing the rounds at gaming conventions and on Steam Early Access over the past few years. The following article contains spoilers for Genital Jousting’s story mode. Someone rammed into the corner and out like a tarantula creeping past attacks.This article was originally published January 2018. Some people prefer to squirm erratically, knocking confusing the enemy. It may seem ridiculous, but even in this competition players have their tactics and techniques. Choose your "character" and lash out at others.įrom the first seconds of the round begins the chaos and genital jostling each desperately wriggling, trying to get to the enemy, and to finish the voltage increases. Sausages genital Jousting 2 - vulgar, funny and it's almost no barrier to entry - the perfect entertainment for a sausage party game with friends. Compete in agility and precision: it is necessary to catch up with the opponent and enter into it, and in an ideal - "looped". Free sausage party game where you control sausages with holes behind. 20,000+ users downloaded Sausages Jousting 2 latest version on 9Apps for free every week! You get various free apps from the store. All high quality mobile apps are available for free download.
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